An Act of Love
by zavyntara
Summary: Can somebody's life be destroyed by an act of love? Slash


Disclaimer: I am owning nothing, thanks.

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To everyone:

I loved Him, you know. Scratch that. I loved the person He portrayed. I loved the person I believed Him to be.

I'd had a crush on Him since fifth year. On the train to school, He came into our compartment to insult us in one way or another, as He does every year. I didn't hear a single word He said, as I only stared at Him. He'd really grown to be so beautiful over the summer. His silvery-blonde hair reached His shoulders, and several loose locks hung in His face. His blue-gray eyes flickered between multiple emotions: anger, amusement…sadness. It was then that I began to change my mind about Him. Maybe He _wasn't_ like His father. Maybe He _wasn't_ evil.

I never thought that He would like me back. I mean, I'm a boy, too, and I doubted that he went that way. Imagine my surprise and delight when we had our first "incident." I couldn't sleep one night, because of a nightmare. It made me think about things, and I ended up sneaking up to the tallest tower in the school. Right as I was about to jump from the window, I heard someone say, "Please, don't."

I turned slightly and saw the blonde hair and the beautiful blue eyes, bright and glassy with tears. I asked Him, "Why? How did you find me?"

"I know where you are at all times. I am to watch you and protect you. Please, just…come down, all right?"

He held His hand out, and for some reason, I didn't even hesitate in grabbing it with my own. A bolt of electricity unexpectedly shot through me when I touched Him, and the next thing I knew, I was hanging from the ledge. He grabbed both of my hands and pulled me back inside, and then He just hugged me. Neither of us spoke as we embraced; we only took comfort in the silence and one another's company.

After just sitting together for a while, He summoned an invisibility cloak and took me back to my dorm. He tucked me into my bed, then touched my cheek and kissed my forehead, telling me to sleep well. Somehow, my sleep was peaceful that night.

After that initial meeting, we began to get together in the tower nearly every night. We spent that time talking quietly or just sitting in silence. I learned a lot about Him during those times. I found out about His home life and that He'd been forced to be so cruel to me over the years. I told Him about how terribly I'd been treated by my aunt, uncle, and cousin; how they sometimes starved me and hit me. He and I held each other as we cried, both of us finally understanding one another.

We kept up this secret friendship for two months, and it soon became _more_ than friendship. We decided not to tell anyone yet, for fear of how they would react.

He was perfect, in my eyes. From His beautiful face and strong physique to how he treated me was all I'd ever wanted. He cared about me. He stayed by my side if I was sick or hurt. He treated me wonderfully, being affectionate at every possible moment. He called me by all kinds of pet names: love, honey, darling… He made me feel so special with all of the romantic things He did for me. Nobody had ever made me feel truly special before.

After three months of being a couple, I told Him I loved Him.

He didn't say anything back. I just figured that, because of His past and such, He couldn't take those words lightly. Then I found out the truth, two months later.

He didn't love me. He didn't care about me. He was just using me.

He was a spy. Not for our side, as we'd thought, but for the side of the one trying to kill me. 

My last night with Him had been the best night of my life. He'd been so caring, so loving, so gentle. He held me in His arms for hours, while I fell asleep. When I awoke, He was gone.

I don't remember much of the next night, when I found out He'd betrayed me—us. I remember hitting the floor, screaming and crying. I remember insisting that it wasn't true. I remember someone holding me and whispering words of comfort in my ear.

I remember wanting to die.

I still want that. Now I will fulfill my wish.

To those who truly loved and cared for me:

I'm sorry that I have to do this, but it must be done. I cannot live my life with all of this pain. What He did hurts too badly. I feel empty. I feel like I can never love or trust again. What kind of a life would that be? I love you all, but you don't need me. Everything will be better this way.

To Him:

Thank you for helping me to love someone for the first time in my life, even if it wasn't really you. The months I spent with you were the best of my life; I just wish it hadn't all been a lie. You're a damn good actor, you know. Tell your Lord that he doesn't have to worry about getting rid of me anymore. What you've done has killed me in itself.

Because of you, I am about to do everything imaginable to get things done right. First, I am going to take a knife and cut my wrists. As the blood pours from the wounds, I will drink a potion that will cause my heart and lungs to stop working, as well as my brain. The potion will take effect within three minutes. As it is working, I will jump from the tower. The tower where I first got to know you—rather, the person you made yourself out to be.

I hope you suffer with the guilt that you have my blood on your hands. It is your fault that I must die, and I hope you feel incredibly guilty for the rest of your life.

Good-bye.

Harry Potter

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What do you think? This may be the prologue to a story, or I may just leave it as-is. Whatever you guys want! Leave a review and let me know!


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